Rebekah is a woman I met in the very supportive #bookstagram community on Instagram. Like me, she’s a big fan of non-fiction books and personal development. Unlike me however she has years of experience investing in the stock market, something I’ve always found intimidating but that she’s doing a good job helping me wrap my head around. Generous with advice and book recommendations, she quickly became one of my favorite Instagram accounts. When I found out she was a mother of five, I was overjoyed for the opportunity to feature her in this interview series. Enjoy her wealth of knowledge, (pun intended).Let’s raise this mother!
Tell me about yourself
I’m 40 years old 😬 I was married at 20 and dropped out of uni to pay for my husbands. The Plan was always for me to go back but I unexpectedly got pregnant and once we had one child we decided to have another and then another and another and one more so I never had the chance to head back to finish up my schooling.
Once my youngest got a little older my husband and I talked about me going back to school but I just didn’t think that the amount of time I would have to invest into it and working on someone else’s schedule for deadlines and test would be worth doing well raising five children.
Knowing I wanted to do something my husband brought a few books home for me to read on investing because he thought I might like it since I am a natural Budgeter and actually take care of almost all of our family finances.
He wasn’t wrong I devoured the first book and then the second. I started looking into all things investing and now I’m able to stay home with the kids and do my own thing on the side at my own time. I’m very thankful for that 😊
I have to say I never in 1 million years would’ve thought this is where I ended up.
My plan was always to be a psychologist have one maybe two children and even then definitely not so soon. Our first child came while my husband was still a student and I became an unemployed stay at home mom. I had to go back to nannying bc it was the only job I could take my baby with me and I still needed to support our family since my husband was a student 🤪😬
From those days to where I am now
Have you always wanted children? If not, when did that change?
Yes, although only 2 and much later in life then it actually happened 🤷♀️
Share a typical day in your life?(with the kids)
I’ll give a most typical day.
Send 2 off off to school with their dad
My oldest has graduated and so he pretty much takes care of himself at this point, but bc he just turned 18 he’s still at home which ends up being a huge help for me if he’s around as he is working 2 jobs and taking an online degree.
After the 15 and 13 yo head to school I do breakfast with the younger two who are 11 and 8. After breakfast we do school because they are homeschooled, they will both be going to school for the 20/21 school year. Homeschool lasts until about 1:00 every day with a break for lunch.
At 1:30 I leave to take my 11-year-old to a tutor because he’s severely dyslexic and his tutor is trained in helping with this. He finishes at 2:30.
At that point we leave tutoring to go pick up the other two who are at school we get home around 3:45 I make a quick snack and I generally will have to drive the 15 year-old to a job or a basketball game or practice, sometimes my oldest helps with this if he is available.
After dinner which is generally between 530 and 630 we then have to take the kids to gymnastics or parkour or guitar. All the activities tend to wrap up by about 930. When we come home we hang out as a family until about 1030 sometimes it does not include my oldest if he’s out working or with friends.
We go to bed late but if we want to be all together as a family
This is a hard question. A lot of what I think would be funny is probably only funny to me..lol
Probably when our firstborn was quite young maybe around three or four we were at a blockbuster, yes they still exsisted 😂 my boy was looking at movies in the childs section, I was kind of down the aisle from him and I asked across the aisle to him if he knew where his dad was and he shouted at the top of his voice oh don’t worry Daddy is just looking at the adult movies 🙄of course he meant anything that wasn’t the Wiggles or backyardigans…ha
What’s something you wish people knew about your kids?
How gracious they give up certain things because they come from a large family. We don’t have huge elaborate birthdays because it would get very pricy with 5 kids. And they don’t have their own bedrooms we just don’t have a house that has 6 bedrooms, at times this is hard for them. For many years the older children could not do extra activities because we couldn’t afford to have 3-4 kids in a bunch of different activities. These are not huge sacrifices but still it was hard for them to watch their friends play hockey, soccer, etc….and they will often mention they would love there own rooms but they always graciously understand that large families often have to give up somethings and the flip side is we all have each other.
What’s something that you wish people knew about you?
That I’m not patient!! Everyone assumes I’m patient because I have 5 kids and have homeschooled all of them at some point in their lives. It’s simply not true! Patience is something that I have had to work really hard on and even now find myself getting frustrated and sweating the small stuff all to often.
What’s the biggest sacrifice of motherhood to you?
Deep friendships. I’ve been so busy with kids for 18 years that many friendships drifted apart. Not because either side did anything it was just life at the time, but I can think of a few friendships that are non existent now that I miss.
Name 3 things you love most about being a mom
1. The laughing!! Especially as my kids have grown. They have me laughing all day 2. All the lessons I’ve learnt on human behaviour. Kids are a fascinating group of people that we can all learn from!! 3. The hugs and snuggles!!!
Who does your tribe consist of, and what’s something that you wish they knew?
My family, my church and some close colleagues.
I wish they knew I didn’t have it all together and I’m tired!! I’m pretty enthusiastic so people assume I have it together and that I never feel exhausted or overwhelmed, but I do and often! Just ask my husband who is my biggest support on a bad day 🙏
What lessons and values do you wish to instill in your children?
I want my kids to grow up to be kind, compassionate and humble. My biggest dream for them is love others deeply and find joy in all circumstances!!
Best motherhood advice you’ve received thus far?
From my mom: figure out video games they are part of culture don’t fight it just set up boundaries 🤷♀️
From my mother in law: don’t forget you!!! Take time to relax and rejuvenate it’s important for your family 💜
Favorite books and why?
The Biblical book of Proverbs because it has so much practical advice, especially about money.
How to Win Friends and Influence People: this book has made every interaction I have with others much better and has reminded me not to put myself first in every situation.
Wisdom for other moms?
Enjoy everyday! Everyone says it goes fast but it really does. I know when kids are little the days seem slow but trust me the years fly by!! Cherish them and say no to extra commitments you don’t need so you can enjoy your babes!
Don’t fret the teenage years, raise your littles with love and compassion, guide them and lead them and be an example to them and the teenage years will have much fruit! I’m actually loving the teenage years 😊
Don’t fret your mistakes!! We all make them. Your gramma made them, your mom made them, you’ll make them and your kids will make them!! Forgive yourself and forgive others, learn from them and move on. Being a mom is hard enough without dwelling on past mistakes.
Get into a community of support it can be a lonely road 💙💙
Can we follow you on social media?
@Read_love_live_ on Instagram
Thank you again Rebekah