Mary and I met in an unorthodox way, we were both pregnant for the first time using a pregnancy app named “What to expect when you’re expecting” and we exchanged social media information in a group named “June 2016 babies”. I noticed her username had something to do with being tall and told her “I bet you I’m taller than you” and then it was history! Fast-forward to today, we both have two sons around the same age, and we’ve become pretty good friends. I can always count on Mary for a generous, judgement-free listening ear, and our kids do the same stuff, so we laugh together a lot. Mary is beautiful, kind and very inspiring to me. Her motivation to eat healthy, maintain an active lifestyle often gets my off my lazy butt. She’s also a sober mom, which I admire a lot considering my shaky at best relationship with alcohol. Enjoy her interview!Let’s raise this mother!
Tell Me About Yourself
I became a mom in June 2016. I’m currently 28 years old and in a relationship Andy, with a merchant marine, who leaves for 4 months at a time. So I’m by myself with the kids a LOT. I live in Newport, Rhode Island USA, a touristy beach town with a huge Navy base. I have quite a bit of tattoos, I’m 6ft tall and I’m the mother of two boys, Sammy and Nico. I enjoy seeing live music and I’m an active participant in a 12-step recovery group. I’ve been clean & sober for almost 5 years and it’s something I’m super proud of and open about! I enjoy good coffee, true crime podcasts, traveling to different cities & exploring all sorts of museums.
Have you always wanted children?
I didn’t always want kids. But it was something I never thought I’d be in the position to do.
Before Andy, I had never been in a long-term relationship and I was always financially unstable. Because I was struggling to support myself, I couldn’t imagine supporting anyone else. But when I met Andy, everything changed.
Share your birth story
Sammy was 9lb 14oz. I was induced at 41+5 and he was posterior so after 22 hours of labor, 3 hours of pushing with nothing to show for it, he was delivered via C-section.
It was traumatic and horrible. But when I saw his squishy face, everything was ok.
He was a super chunky baby and nursed constantly! We co-slept and did everything together. I stayed home with both my kids. Nico was a repeat C-section which was SUPER easy. He is completely different than Sammy in almost every way. He is calm, clingy, doesn’t like to be too far from me while Sammy was always independent, wanted to be on his own and extremely energetic.
Funniest memory of Sammy? That’s tough. Just the other day he was playing on the playground with some Spanish-speaking kids and he said, “I’m coming amigos!”
We’ve been trying to teach him Spanish and I had no idea he was listening until he said that. My funniest memory of Nico is just whenever I’m in a different room, I look up and he’s followed me with a huge smile.
What’s something that you wish people knew about your kids?
I wish people knew that Sammy is just a high energy kid with big feelings.
He can be hyper, defiant and a little naughty but he is really just feeling all the things and exploring the world around him!! Also, he’s big for his age so I wish people would stop expecting him to behave like a 4 year old.
What’s something that you wish people knew about you?
I wish people knew how overwhelmed I felt all the time and how hard it is to ask for help. I definitely have options for help, it’s just accepting that I need to reach out & ask for it which is the hard part.
What’s the biggest sacrifice of motherhood to you?
The biggest sacrifice of motherhood has probably just been losing my identity.
I’ve given up my career, the things I once enjoyed and put my strict recovery program aside because it doesn’t line up with my kids schedules. Everything has changed. I still try to incorporate the things I like to do in life & I still make meetings when I can, but trying to find myself again has been the biggest struggle.
Name 3 things you love about being a mom
1) the SNUGGLES
2) watching little ones experience something for the first time and learn
3) watching the little ones interact with others, knowing Ive raised a kind person so far
They say it takes a village to Raise one, Name your Tribe
My tribe consists of two really strong women. Jesse (mother of 3 girls, all around badass) and Crystal (mother of a boy & girl, also very cool and very supportive). There’s not much they don’t know! I guess I wish they knew how much I appreciate them and their friendship.
What’s something that you wish you could teach your boys?
I hope I can teach my boys how to grow up to be GOOD men. Kind, respectful, gentle, intelligent, patient, open-minded, tolerant & good natured men who can listen and be empathetic to others. I really hope I can just guide them in the right direction so they can be the best people they can be.
May we follow you on Social Media?
my IG is @marymaudelol and yes you can follow me!
Advice for new moms?
My advice for moms-to-be is probably just get ready for everything to change. Your heart will grow 10,000 sizes and you are about to experience a love like you’ve never known before.